Ghosting Busters


June 16, 2020 by readlisaread

I’ve been thinking about this quite a bit lately:


1.the appearance of a ghost or secondary image on a television or other display screen.
2.the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.


It’s the second, more contemporary definition that I’m thinking of, but the first is good too– metaphorically that we are allowing people to be shadowy figures, barely there in our lives– or possibly we are being those flashy, silvery sparks out of the corner of someone’s eye, fading away when their head turns.

So, yeah, dating is fun.

What are the reasons?  We’re busy, we get absorbed in our lives– I get that. Do we think it’s kinder? Kinder than saying, as if we were characters in a 1990’s movie “I’m just not that into you”?  Or is it laziness?

The spring COVID Lockdown really taught me a lot about relationships– and especially about being alone.  I am amused that one of the things I barely did during “The COVID” was journal or write.  It seemed too exhausting to think and talk about my feelings.  Maybe that’s all ghosting is, being too exhausted to talk about it.

The thing is, you aren’t sparing the Ghostee any hurt feelings–you are just prolonging them, stretching them out, watering them down with confusion and assumptions so that they seem less intense. It’s almost as if the feelings are expected to thin out, become pale, weak, flickering imitations, something you just catch out of the side of your eye. A ghost of an emotion.

And before you read too much into this, gentle reader, this time It is not All About Me.  It’s just a reflection, an observation, a way I don’t want to be.

My peeps know who they are.




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