Friends.  A couple of things today.  First, here I am earlier today, wearing Orange:

We recognize Orange Shirt day as a reminder.  A reminder of an unattractive past. Oh… “unattractive” is a pretty bland word…. how about “appalling”, or “shameful”, or maybe even “horrifying”. Here is a good place to start reading, if you want to know more: http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/orange-shirt-day-1.3785597

Throughout the day, though, I received messages.  No, no, gentle reader, I don’t mean via phone or email, I mean from the universe. The first was, ironically, about pictures.  I have a lot of *stuff* in my office at work– books and electronics and artwork, there’s a picture of me on a roller coaster, and pictures of my collection of *questionable* animal-name ferry tickets. (if you don’t know what this means, it’s a post for another day). A co-worker came in and was admiring something in my collection, and the talk turned to photos.  She said that it occurred to her that teachers who ask kids to bring in photos for projects are not considering 2 things: 1)The reality of living, as we do, in a digital age (yes, yes, I know–anyone can just print off a paper copy of a digital photo); 2) Not everyone, actually, has the wherewithal to “just print off a paper copy of a digital photo”. We must be mindful of the context. While to most of us, that seems a simple, and normal, request, to the marginalized family, a printed photo may be beyond the scope of what they can provide.  And so the child feels unable to complete the assignment, to ask for adaptations, doesn’t do it, saves face by posturing, or just withdraws…. and so the cycle continues. This is only one of the reasons why our practice must change. That “photo collage” project is easily done electronically, and so if you are inclined to think “there is nothing wrong with old fashioned pencil, paper and glue”, think that one again.

The next message, so relevant to the Orange Shirts we wore, was about family. Again, a traditional assignment, that could so easily be tweaked to consider the realities of today, not 1974.  The children in this particular class had been asked to bring in a picture of their family. Let that sit with you a moment. Set aside the printed photo issue from above, and just think about all the possibilities here. Now, be an 8 year old. Be an 8 year old in a blended family, or a foster home, or being raised by grandparents, or being jointly raised by 2 parents.  Be an 8 year old who has been teased about his two moms or two dads. Be an 8 year old whose parents don’t know how to make a family, because their parents didn’t live in their own family for their formative years, and so 2 or 3 generations never learned to parent, never experienced a traditional sense of family. That’s not to suggest that teachers wouldn’t want that activity to be all-inclusive and diverse, it’s to gently assert that sometimes we don’t realize how the words we utter fall, or where they land.

It’s not enough to talk about equality. We need to talk about equity. I chose the word “marginalized”, above, with purpose. It’s just a reality that we have to give more to some than others. That’s why it’s called Reconciliation. It’s not called “Everyone gets a car and call it good”. We aren’t Oprah. We are a society that has to raise our children with respect, and dignity.